Love Lives in Loserville is adult fiction. It includes vulgar language and occasional descriptions of sexual acts. Reader discretion is advised.

Introduction, notes, and acknowledgements
Prologue: &$%$# Pretentious &$%#*#heads
Chapter One: The Beginning and the End of the Beginning of the End
Chapter Two: Mission Impossible

My friend assures me it's all or nothing.
I am not worried. I am not overly concerned
My friend implores me, for one time only,
Make an exception. I am not not worried.
-- "Anna Begins", Counting Crows

( Chapter Two: Mission Impossible )

If you want heroes keep them safe
They dont stand up to life so
Lock them in your soul and lose the key
-- Lush, "Heavenly Nobodies"

( Chapter one )

Love Lives in Loserville is adult fiction. It includes vulgar language and occasional descriptions of sexual acts. Reader discretion is advised.

"Oooo, you're sitting so close to me,
And I'm as happy as could be,
If only you'd stop talking about your mom,
your one man show, and your semester abroad!"
--"Shut Up and Make Out" by The Hazzards

( Prologue )

Notes: In all fairness, this should have started it's online life last November.

I came up with the idea in October of 2004. It's taken about 14 months to reach the point of being more than just an interesting story to tell people when they ask what I write about.

I have no planned schedule for updating this. If it draws enough readers, I might decide on a biweekly format, to give myself deadlines. I might not. We'll see.

Acknowledgements: Many thanks to folks who've helped along the way, be it offering up crazy love stories of their own, cheering me on, or occasionally being the beta-readers for bits and pieces here and there.

Even more thanks to the friends who've had to listen to me babble some of these stories over and over again before I ever figured out that I really ought to be writing them down.

And of course, thanks to all those guys who will be appearing, in some fictionalized form or another, in this narrative.

Disclaimer: As the subtitle says, the stories here are mostly true. That means they are sort of false. Any untruths are usually to be found in exagerations and embellishments. Some of these guys don't need my help to appear to be absolutely outrageous. Some really do.

Readers: Do you have a tale of Loserville to share? At the moment I'm not taking submissions, but that may change. Feel free to email me with any of those stories you think might fit in with this narrative. Just be aware that doing so, unless you expressly state otherwise, is giving me permission to tweak, exaggerate, and embellish until it can find a place among the Loserville tales I'm already planning to include.